The push and pull of being a teacher

I must admit it was rather weird to sleep in this Saturday morning. I haven't done that in what seems like forever. My body enjoyed the rest, until my brain kicked in and started thinking about my students, parent conferences this week, the list of things I need to get done at school, and up and awake I became.

As a renewed teacher- not new, more like recycled- I'm struggling with all that I seem to be lacking. Curriculum development, understanding EST processes, understanding special ed requirements and processes, assessment procedures, rubrics, reading running records, reading and writing conferences with students.... I'm getting that I-may-have-an-anxiety-attack feeling. BREATHE.... I'm ok. just a bit overwhelmed. I've brought this upon myself, but there's no way to escape it. I've been out of the inner sanctum loop of teaching for 7 years. Now that I'm in it, I just have to hike up my pants and get through it as best as I can.

Thank goodness I have a helpful and caring 2nd grade teacher to work with. She (without knowing it) helps me focus on what I CAN do, and not to worry about all the other stuff- "it will come" she says. I've been a chronic worrier for all my life. Hence why I have had gray hair since I was 15 or 16. Yes genetics plays a part in that, but still. I'm also a perfectionist and want to know and do everything perfect RIGHT NOW. Alas, it doesn't work that way. Hence my pursuit of patience.

So on this cold and gray Saturday in late October, I'll be heading into school soon to work on the things that I can do to help my students, not the things I can't. That doesn't mean I'll stop worrying about my little girl who's parents are divorcing or my little boy who doesn't sleep for who knows what reason. They are my kids- not biological, but my kids nonetheless. All 11 of them that I want to be respectful and responsible citizens. I want to set high standards for them so that they will want to work hard and because I KNOW they can reach those high standards. They may not want to reach them (stubborn little one) but I now that they can, and I will push them gently but firmly, because THEY NEED THAT.

Ok, I'll get off my educational soapbox and get going. Do something for me- think about a teacher you had. Good or bad- why do you remember him or her? Did they set high standards for you and your class? Did they bring you on fun field trips that connected with what you were studying? What makes them a special teacher to remember?

Procrastination at it's finest

As I'm thinking how to write this blog, a little play on Sam Cooke's "It's Another Saturday Night" but changing the words to "It's another Sunday night and I'm procrastinating... getting everything done can be so aggravating.." I'm tired and can't think of anything else snappy to add there...

I started taking a welding class at local technical center. It is hard, but it's good. Today, I took a class at LLBean in Freeport (I was in Maine for the short weekend). I took clay shooting which was also hard. It was good to have more practice shooting a shotgun than I did in my hunter safety course, but it was hard. One of the teachers told me I should take the 1/2 day course that's more intense for shotgun. I'll look into it, because I'd like to go out with my dad and go duck hunting. Get my dad off the farm for a couple of hours or so.

While I was in Maine this weekend (the main reason- haha- was to see my nephew in a soccer tournament), I was talking to my brother and his wife about how school was going, and how I was feeling overwhelmed because I haven't been in this role for 7 years and I just want to know everything and for everything to come easy. I (finally) realized that I have to be patient. My never ending pursuit!! It's hard to not feel depressed or impatient when everyone else has their stuff  together and they make everything look so easy, when I'm at school until 6pm and still running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I know, I know. Breathe. It will come. Patience.

That reminds me of another song... "Patience.... yeah...ah..." Ah, Guns N Roses... good 80's band. So for all of you folks who have had a change in your life- being a grandmother, being a husband/wife/mother/father, a new job, or what have you, please don't think perfection will just switch on it's light for you. You work at it and have patience. You and I will work on that.

Just like Bob here. We all need to take Baby Steps.

You can't always get what you want....

A colleague and I were talking yesterday about the folks in Washington who have made total asses of themselves and our country.

I had been thinking, then said it aloud, "Why is it we have to teach that bullying is wrong, but it's ok if people who represent us and our country to be bullies?" Great role models, Washington.

We here in schools around the country teach our children (our future) that we need to be respectful, responsible, and safe citizens. Why is it then that our leaders, people who our children, as well as adults, are to look up to as role models for our country, are so disrespectful to each other and to themselves?

We also teach our children to work together and to play fair. Why can't the "adults" in Washington learn how to work together?

I had a student last week that had a bit of a tantrum and I had her go take a time out. When I talked to her about why she had to be in a time out, I quoted the wonderful Rolling Stones- "You can't always get what you want... but you find sometimes, you get what you need." (I must admit, I made myself laugh... and got my student thinking I was a big fruitloop, but anyways...)

The folks in Washington need to heed to the Rolling Stones epic words. That's why we sent them to Washington- to get work done! We did not vote these folks into office to dig in their heels and not compromise! We didn't vote for people to point fingers and blame each other!

It doesn't matter whether we are republican or democrat, rich, or poor. We all had the choice to vote for who we think should represent us- our communities, our state, our country. It doesn't look like ANYONE has done a good job of representing us.

Or have they?

Is this what we've become? Adults acting like young children- pointing the blame at everyone else but them? Not working together for the common good? No respect? No teamwork? No responsibility? Having tantrums because the can't have things just the way they want? Seriously?


Folks in Washington, here's some tips from my students.

Always be respectful by playing fair at home and at school with your friends.

Doesn't sound like Washington is playing fair with their "friends".
 

Always be responsible by bringing your homework back, finished (most days).

Where's that budget that was due for "homework", Washington???

Always be fair by not cheating in games.

Hey Washington- you're cheating the American public by playing games!!

 

So, on behalf of my second graders (also known as THE FUTURE), be respectful, be responsible and be fair. These kids are watching.